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Watching shows like Eat Your Kimchi might help a tiny bit but in my experience nothing helped better than reading and having good Korean friends.
When I moved to Korea, I read that showing cleavage and shoulders and all of that was a no no and so I didn’t do it. I come off as more cute than sexy, more stays-home-and-bakes-cookies than goes out to the club. It’s just that as a Western woman in Asia, you ARE a stereotype and you’re gonna have to fight that every step of the way if you want even an ounce of respect. When I came to Korea I was a bit ignorant and naive and honestly I was used to dating Asian Americans who’ve been taught to understand that no means no. In fact it’s common in Korea for girls to pretend that they don’t want sex even when they do want sex because Korean women are not always allowed to express their sexuality fully, at least not at first in a relationship (See previous link).When I arrived in Korea in September 2013 I sort of hit the ground running as far as dating went and started finding guys to drink coffee with and go out with as soon as I arrived. I met guys at bars, at church, online, and even at the 7-Eleven by my house. I’ve polled some of my friends who have dated in Korea and I’ve racked my mind about it and so without further ado, and in no particular order, here’s a list of things I think every woman should know.I mean, I’ve always been the introverted type and have never been much of a party-girl but for me and my standards, I was going all out. By the time I had been in Korea about 7 or 8 months, I looked around and noticed I knew quite a number of other Western girls who had also been burned and disillusioned from their experiences with dating Korean men. Dating in Korea: What Every Woman Should Know 1.) Get Yourself A Korean Bestie and Pour Your Little Heart Out* Nobody will be able to give you dating advice in Korea better than another Korean and your best bet is to have a Korean girlfriend who is around your age. I’m on a long distance bus ride with one of my Korean co-workers who would end up being one of my closest friends and we’re talking about dating.So, when you say My advice and plea to Western women is to not sleep with someone on the first date (or the second) in Korea.If you do, you are just cementing an already established stereotype into the mind of the collective cultural mindset.
But the truth is that when I have dated, both in Seattle and abroad, it’s almost always been with Asian males. We all know that motivations are always this abstract, jumbled mess of things. I tutored Asian ESL students when I was a university student, both male and female and I always admired and respected how hard they worked.